Because friendships get underplayed on the love holiday: “Both young men had literary ambitions, which were directed, in their undergraduate days, promiscuously between poetry and prose; they used to show each other their work, and one of the things Amis lamented, at Larkin’s death, was the fact that he couldn’t any more.” (thanks, Kirsten!)
Rose petals a la American Beauty? A bad idea.
The publishing version of the birds and the bees (be careful you don’t publish too much or you might get a social disease).
A portrait of the average girl. If you tell her you like her for her brains, I bet you could get her into bed. People respond to praise, you know.
And if she doesn’t have Steven Pinker‘s luxuriant, flowing hair, lie to her. Especially if it so happens that you’re on the lawn and she’s someone else’s wife.
Don’t take sex advice from these people: “Just don’t wear underwear”? Aren’t you concerned about the chafing?
“People will read a story if there is infidelity in it.”
Research proves loves makes people crazy. Um, duh?
“Did you know that ‘virgin’ is an anagram of Irving?”
Oh, Frank. You’ll always be the chairman of my board. Just love me do, darling. In any language you like, so long as we never stop falling in love.
For those of you without Valentines: some philosophy porn (yes, it’s safe for work).