Katherine Kottaras is originally from Chicago, and now she writes and teaches in the Los Angeles area. She holds an M.A. in English from the University of California, Irvine and teaches writing and literature at Pasadena City College and is a certified yogi. She is an active member of NCTE and SCBWI, as well as a proud board member of the Children’s Literature Council of Southern California. Katherine is interested in the stories we tell, the stories we are given, and the ways we can redefine our worlds by discovering which stories are true. She is the author of the YA contemporary novels How to be Brave (2015) and The Best Possible Answer (2016), both from St. Martin’s Press/Griffin Teen. Visit her online at ekatwrites.com.
Kathy, you and I have known each other for almost a decade, and I remember about five years or so ago when you said “I want to write a book.” And now, here we are, and you’ve got two books out with St. Martin’s Press, a major YA press, and you’re featured at numerous Readings and YA Festivals! It’s such an inspiration! Your two books How to Be Brave (2015) and The Best Possible Answer (2016) have both received enormous praise for their authenticity and the way you’ve been able to capture the teen experience. When did you first know you wanted to be a writer?
Thank you so much! I’ve been writing since I was four years old—strange little odes to Crystal Gayle, my favorite country singer of the ’80s—oh how I wanted her hair! I wrote throughout high school via environmentally-themed zines that my friends and I Xeroxed and handed out to the entire school, as well as secret poetry written in journals stashed under my bed. Of course, there were all those papers for college and grad school. I know—I’m a freak because I love writing essays for school!
I think that’s the way a lot of us get started—all those secret writings and anonymous sharing with the world. I know that when you made the decision to “go for it” you had a pretty clear plan of how to get there. Full-time teachers and parents everywhere want to hear how you did it. Do you mind sharing a bit about your journey to publication?
Well, I didn’t pursue creative writing seriously until I was twenty-five, when I signed up for classes at UCLA. About seven years later after taking classes in short story, nonfiction, and YA, I finally decided to start submitting my work places—poetry, short stories, essays, etc. However, it was the YA novel format that called to me the most, partly because I am a fan of young adult literature and partly because I felt that it was the way I could express the story that was calling to me most honestly. So I decided to write a book. It was a Young Adult “paranormal” book and it took me four years to write. I was rejected by absolutely every single agent I queried. Not even one request.
After a bit of soul-searching and some acceptance that perhaps this book wasn’t “the one,” I started over. I took more classes through Litreactor where I started the book that has eventually became How to Be Brave. I’ve been extreeeeeemely lucky. The process was fairly quick from that initial draft to publication—just about three years, which is quite amazing!
How to Be Brave is such a touching book. The main character is still reeling from the death of her mother and is living with her Greek dad and having all of these feelings about grief, fitting in, and how to heal herself. Knowing a little bit about you and your history, I can see some similarities in themes with your life and the life of your main character.
Yes. Though that story is not autobiographical, much of How to Be Brave is “true” in the sense that it was written after a difficult period of my life. After my mother passed away when my daughter was ten months old, I found myself sandwiched between the death of my best friend, my mom, and the presence of this new life. It was a dark and confusing time—I wanted to drown in my grief but also knew I had to keep myself afloat for the sake of my new baby. I started writing with this grief and survival in mind—I was looking forward to the life of my own daughter, thinking about what I want for her.
Is this when you turned to writing as a way to heal yourself?
Absolutely. On my darkest days, my husband would tell me to take time for myself—to go for walks, yoga, etc.—but more often than not, I would find myself at the library, writing.
The act of writing was a way for me to work through my own grief and to also find new purpose my life.
You’re part Greek, and the main character, Georgia, in your first book is Greek. The main character in your second book is a Soviet Jewish emigre. Can you talk a little bit about writing those characters and how some of their backgrounds and experiences mirror your own?
I am both a first-generation and a second-generation American. My father immigrated from Greece in 1952 and my mother’s parents were both Russian Jews who left the Ukraine and Belarus in 1913, so I am always interested in the unique pressures of being the child of immigrants, as I was.
But it wasn’t only the pressure surrounding being an immigrant and first/second generation American that I experienced as a high school student. There was also the pressure of being academically successful. I was in honors classes, including Advanced Placement courses, and I was also part of a rigorous International Baccalaureate program in High school. While some of the pressure to succeed came from my parents, much of it was simply part of the educational system. After high school and through college, I continuously and secretly suffered from anxiety and from paralyzing panic attacks throughout my twenties, both from the grief of losing my father and from the pressures of feeling that I needed to be so successful.
That’s something that both of your characters experience in a big way!
Yes, and the thing is, I didn’t really know what was happening. I didn’t know I had something called GAD or General Anxiety Disorder, and I couldn’t name the panic attacks, nor was I aware this was something I should seek help for. In fact, I’d been told that if I ever sought psychological help via a therapist or group support, I should not use my own medical insurance for fear that my employers would find out that I was “unstable” and I might therefore lose my job. It took me many years to finally seek support and understand my own mind.
I’ll bet you see this a lot in your students, too, this push to be successful and the pressures that come with that?
Yes, definitely. As a teacher at both the high school and community college levels, I’ve met many students—many who are children of immigrants—who also feel the intense pressures of success, both from their families and from the mere need for financial survival, and who as a result, suffer from severe and often secret anxiety. I teach English where we focus on creative expression and the makings of an examined life through words, so students often want to share their inner lives with me, both in writing and in conversation, including their mental health issues.
I have to remind them that I am not a psychologist or counselor, and I also direct them towards our free psychological services, but many students respond that their parents would—and I quote—“kill” them if they knew they had sought psychological help. Every time I hear this, my heart breaks. There is a stigma attached to the very real experience of GAD and panic attacks, as well as to psychological counseling. I wrote both books for both myself when I was a teenager, and most certainly for my own students and all readers who are like my students, who may be experiencing these pressures, so that they can see their experience represented and also find that there does not have to be that stigma. I want them to know that seeking help is not a sign of weakness but a sign of self-care and really, a sign of beautiful strength.
In what other ways do you see your identities and roles impacting your teaching?
Joan Didion said, “We write to discover what we think.” This speaks the core of my experience as a writer, and it’s a thought that I share with my students repeatedly. Whether I am teaching creative writing, literature, or composition, I want my students to begin from a place of inquiry.
I want my students to see writing as an exploration, a journey of discovery, a path towards knowledge.
I also think it’s important to be honest with my students when discussing how horribly frustrating that process can be. I tell them when I’m experiencing writer’s block; I show them my rejection letters; I let them know that I, too, cry sometimes when the words just will not come. I’ve always believed that my role as both a writer and a teacher is not to proselytize, but to guide and to question. That being said, I do try to live by example, which to me means showing my own vulnerabilities as a human being who’s trying to figure it all out. I find that students appreciate hearing about these experiences, that when I share my own frustrations, they feel more comfortable sharing their own and thereby figuring out ways to deal with them and get their words on the page.
That honesty and vulnerability is so profound, and it’s definitely at the core of your books. What I love about your books is that they deal with these really big, deep, life-changing issues—and these circumstances often have the possibility of impacting the characters’ ideas of who they are in really incredible ways. Your characters are often at a crossroads of change in their lives.
Why thank you!
I think your observation speaks to the core of what kinds of stories I love to read and watch. Give me a character with a strong voice but who’s found herself in the midst of a complicated situation where she must be tested in subtle ways—it’s not always life or death, dragons or horribly evil villains—it’s the quiet pressures that intrigue me, the barriers that we set up against ourselves.
In your second book, the main character is also dealing with some difficult social pressures too, fueled by our social media culture. There are so many pressures teens and students are feeling these days. I love the way your second book follows the character’s journey in understanding her own role in what she’s experiencing, and then she develops this present-moment mindset that gives her strength and resiliency. Why are you drawn to these kinds of experiences?
I love everyday heroes, and I think it’s important that we explore these stories, not necessarily as brochures. I hate explicitly moralistic novels, and am drawn more to questions about what it means to live a life of meaning.
You are a Yogi and a proponent of meditation and mindfulness, in your own life and in the classroom. I love that in your book, Georgia finds solace and healing through the community offered in yoga, and Viviana in the second book really exudes this mindfulness in a world of chaos and rediscovers joy despite some dark truths that get revealed. Can you talk a little bit about if and how mindfulness, yoga, and meditation informs your writing and your teaching?
I am in my head—a lot. My yoga practice grounds me like nothing else. One definition of yoga is the linking of body and breath to focus the mind. I find that when I’m not doing my practice, I can’t focus and I become easily overwhelmed by my fears and my anxiety—and as a result, I can’t write. When I am doing my practice, I’m able to deal with those fears and those anxieties in a way that is healthy. The same goes for my teaching. In order for me to be fully present with my students, I have to be centered and open. My personal practice allows me to give back, both in my writing and in the classroom.
What’s your writing life like? As a full-time teacher and a mom, you have a lot going on. How do you make the time? What’s your development process like?
I steal time. Sometimes I write only at night, after my daughter goes to sleep. Sometimes I am awake before dawn. Sometimes I write on my Notes app on my phone while my daughter is in voice lessons. I often use holidays and breaks to dive into my writing, during which I can spend weeks or months writing every day. And I love those times. I am able to immerse myself in the world of my story and fully commit to the experience of being a writer.
YA Novels are exploding as one of the fastest growing genres, not just for high school readers either. A lot of adults are loving YA novels too. There are so many critics out there who say YA novels can’t be “literary” or “beautiful writing,” but your books—especially the second one, which I love so much—really take that claim to task. The characters are authentic and real and fully evolved, and the writing is gorgeous and has really connected with lots of readers of all ages. What’s your take on today’s YA novels?
Thank you so much for saying that about my writing!
Unfortunately YA books do carry a stigma of being “less than,” and I think that’s partly because they’re so popular—and you’re right, a majority of YA readers are, increasingly, adults! I personally love reading all genres in YA particularly because the writing is so beautiful.
As for how to define YA, I’ve heard some YA writers say that they do not write with a teen audience in mind—that they just focus on the story at hand, while others insist that they write specifically for teens. The thing is, “young adult” books are categorized as such simply because the protagonist is somewhere between the ages of 13-19. That’s it. When we look at it through the lens of that simple definition, we can see that what are now marketed as “YA” are what we used to call “bildungsroman,” or coming-of-age novels. I think that the reason why so many adults, and of course, teens, love to read YA is because the novels usually focus on a moment of intense change, as you mentioned, and though we’ve been sold the story that once we hit a certain point, we are “adults,” the truth is that we are continuously facing intense moments of change and growth throughout our lives. I think that YA novels are a way for readers of all ages to reflect on those experiences.
YA Novels in general seem to offer a lot in the way of self-discovery, and I think you’re right—that’s what’s so appealing to readers—finding a little bit about themselves and their own experiences on the page. What do you hope your readers get out of your books?
I hope that my readers will ask the same questions that my characters must ask of themselves: What is courage? What is truth? What is trust? What is strength? I like to say that there’s an invisible question mark at the end of How to Be Brave, and as for The Best Possible Answer, well, even when you think you’ve found it, it can only lead to more questions. And I love that.
Besides your two great books, what other books should readers be checking out right now?
There are SO many, I don’t even know where to begin! I LOVE contemporary novels, so here’s a not very short list of awesome books you should check out:
That Thing We Call a Heart by Sheba Karim
The Education of Margot Sanchez by Liliam Rivera
The Hate U Give by Angie Thomas
I Believe in a Thing Called Love by Maurene Goo
The Library of Fates by Aditi Khorana
It’s too hard to stop. I could keep recommending for days!
Where can your fans see you next?
In September I’ll be at the Pasadena Loves YA Festival featured on the “Love and Trust” panel, with Maurene Goo, Ameriie, and B.T. Gottfred, and then at the Temple City Library, Temple City, CA. In November I’ll be at the California Library Association’s conference doing a panel on Fighting Words: A Program Description of a Salon-Style Discussion of Intellectual Freedom in Children’s Literature.
Katherine’s latest book is available from Griffinteen.
